I have let the whole week slip by without getting up a blog post. How did that happen? People say “Thank God it is Friday”, but I dread it because Friday comes and there is still so much to do.

Perhaps that is because I am an entrepreneur at heart. I like being my own boss, but sometimes I disappoint myself when I don’t complete tasks that I certainly COULD have finished. Are you that way? I complete one task to avoid the next (possibly more important) one. It just makes so much sense to finish other things, and NOT work on the thing that is a constant event every week. I KNOW I must put up a blog post, and I want to put up a blog post. So why DON’T I do it?

That is a mystery that plagues a lot more people than just me. Is it fear of failure? Or is it fear of success? Naturally there is fear of condemnation, especially from my children. Their disapproval counts double or triple that of anyone else. The urge to write is so strong that I cannot fight it, and don’t want to. But the feeling that it is not important enough to bother putting out there, is real. Yet, I know this is almost universal. So perhaps by writing this, I will show someone that it is OK to feel that way.

Just write anyway.

I am designing a workshop for the “Self Care” of caregivers, and it may need a section on Procrastination. Since I am a caregiver for my mother who is 101 years old, I know why that self care is needed. It is something that I have been learning day by day, myself. And now that I am working on planning to design the workshop about it, I am finding ways to procrastinate about that.

In order to avoid writing ‘the plan’, I am supposed to write, I will get going on this blog post. It helps to get one thing done, while avoiding the other. What a silly and very “human” way to go about completing tasks. It is sort of like a clogged drain, or maybe a traffic jam. It takes something bigger and stronger to push the drain open or to force the cars forward, to open the space and keep things moving.

Well, this may not have a happy ending. However the blog post is just about complete. What I need is more depth or something of interest. So reading this won’t be like watching the daffodils which just seem to be so slow this year. They have been poking through for months it seems. Now we are on the way to April. They are late. Perhaps procrastinating like me. Every day I go outside to look for even one bloom. I have cut Forsythia and some Camellias, but only two daffodils and that was last week. There are hundreds more to bloom But it has not happened yet. Would you call that procrastination on the part of Mother Nature?

Copyright 2019 Bonnie B. Matheson